Suburban Goddess

I, again, have been knifed by someone that I trust. Someone I thought the world of, who I considered a friend.

Do you ever really know somebody? Why is it that parting ways can bring out a personality that you never thought lived within someone? How can I be such a horrible judge of character?

How do you know that you need anxiety medicine? At what point do you simply say, “I cannot take anymore, medicate me please.” I’d like to think I should be able to handle life’s little stresses without medication; after all, my life is cake. But when the pressure behind my eyes threatens to pop it from my skull, I have to wonder… why is it so hard for me to de-stress like a normal human being?

On the anniversary of Katrina, I spent most of the day being irritated, annoyed, aggrivated, & generally pissed off. Yes, there are those who genuinely needed help and perished because nobody came to help them. I’m NOT talking about those people; I’m irritated with those who had ample warning & opportunity to leave and still chose not to. And now those people are whining about how the government isn’t helping them.

Then I watched the Spike Lee special on HBO. And reality hit; the government ISN’T helping them. I’m no idiot; I know billionaires everywhere are waiting out the Ninth Ward residents. That’s prime industrial real estate right there. And the East? Where there is STILL no electricity and running water? Ideal condo space. When you see people living in tents NINE MONTHS later, you have GOT to wonder, WHY? It is pure, complete and total economic warfare, and these people don’t have the money to play. So while their property’s welfare is decided amongst crooked Louisiana bureaucrats looking to line their pockets with money from the carbetbaggers, they sit and suffer. Too stubborn, too proud to leave. Yet you elected the same officials to run your city. If they didn’t help you then, why do you think they’re going to help you now? When are you going to WAKE UP? Let them bulldoze what’s left of your belongings, and put a big price tag on your land. Then go buy a condo uptown, where they’re all hiding. That’ll fix ‘em.

After remaining calm, cool & frightening collected at work for a month, one of my employees has quit. But a remarkable thing has happened… my stress level is dropping. By trying to keep a level head, I’ve inadvertently changed the way that I handle certain situations. By trying to keep a level head, I have ACTUALLY KEPT a level head. I thought I would have to fake it, and pretend that I was calm even though everything was chaos inside, but I’m finding that I don’t have to. By not buying into the drama around me, I don’t give people a reason to BE dramatic. And things are getting done. And people are bitching less. And working more! These are some delightful side effects. So, even though there’s a body count, I think it will actually work to my department’s benefit…