Suburban Goddess

I don’t have a glamourous advertising job; what I do is equivalent to digging trenches in the advertising world. I have to get my creative shot by freelancing, and even then, it’s not the free-thinking-tree-hugging-happy-out-of-the-box creative experience that everyone thinks is associated with graphic design. I design logos for subdivisions, I create direct mail for lawyers, I make a t-shirt or two. Yawn.

Every year, I cruise over to the the ADDY awards site. In my industry, it’s the equivalent of an Oscar. I dream the unattainable dream that someday I will be recognized for my unlimited creative ability. It’s a fantasy of mine.

A couple of years ago, I was going through the entry list when a name stuck out like a glaring red neon sign. I will not write that name here for fear he may Google himself & find this page, as I know the egotistical bastard used to do. That would be the name of my FIRST ex-husband, who does not even deserve mention. But there he was, a COPYWRITER no less, receiving advertising’s highest honor.

I wanted to throw up.

To this day, I’m STILL paying for HIS master’s degree (”Let’s just borrow more from YOUR student loans and we’ll use mine to go to Europe!”). And while I’m toiling away in the hell of retail advertising, he’s living the glamourous life. Well, I made the mistake of heading over to the ADDY site again this week, and lo & behold, there he was again. TWO TIMES.

Now, I’ve said it before, I believe in karma. I really do. I have to believe in it, because if it doesn’t exist, I’ve been nice to people I hate for NOTHING when I could have been kicking them in the knees years ago. So I stopped for a moment to think, “What have I done?”

1.) Made fun of my mother-in-law. (I meant no harm in it, and I feel really bad about hurting her feelings, but I wasn’t lying or intentionally trying to be spiteful. I just thought it would make a funny story.)

2.) Said mean things about a drunk friend. (But he’s always drunk, and I felt that someone needed to point it out to him for his own good before he does something stupid.)

3.) Screamed at people while driving. (In my passive aggressive way, of course, with the windows up and mumbling like a crazy person. If you get bad karma for this, then that explains EVERYTHING.)

But I honestly can’t think of anything to deserve this level of misery. Unless it was retro-karma, that karma that stores up over the years that you thought you’d escaped. If that’s the case, I would think by now I would have suffered enough and there has to be an end to this soon. I mean, I’d have to murder someone to get this much unhappiness all at once. (Sometimes I wish I had… no… just kidding….no….not really…)

Seriously, when it rains, it pours. I need a little sunshine.

This entry was posted on March 21, 2007 at 1:42 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.