Suburban Goddess

Tomorrow night, my soon to be ex-stepson is in a play. I’ve known about it for quite some time, and I really wanted to go. Today, my friend K called and asked if I wanted to go (her son is also in the play, and a lot of the neighbors are going for support.) I told her yes.

Last I heard, Chip and his girl had split up last weekend. So I figured she wouldn’t be there this week. I love my stepson, and I miss him a lot… so I really, really want to go support him.

I ran some errands, and when I got home, there was a message from Chip. When I returned the call, he was pissed. He felt I was “disrespecting him” by not calling to ask his feelings on the matter before committing to going. It was then that I found out he was bringing his girl (on again).

So here’s the deal. I don’t really care. In fact, I just kinda want to get it over with, so I don’t have to worry when the “big meeting” will occur. The fact of the matter is, the StepKid should be the focus tomorrow night. It’s HIS night. Not mine, not Chip’s, not the girlfriend. And considering he doesn’t have that many friends here in Texas, I want to support him. I remember how cool it was to be on stage, and know that there were people in the audience there to just see ME.

If Chip has a problem with me being there, it’s HIS problem, not mine. If his girl has a problem with me being there, it’s HER problem, not mine. I’m sick of being expected to crawl under a rock and hide just because someone has insecurities. I don’t WANT him back. She did me a FAVOR. Hell, I want to shake her hand, say thank you, and wish her luck, because she’s gonna need it…

But being told that I was being “disrespectful” was the last straw. I have spent six years considering this man’s feelings. I have tiptoed on glass… I have held my breath… I have bitten my tongue…

I am going to support a little boy who means a great deal to me. He is my daughter’s brother. He may not be my biological child, but I love him, and I miss him. And if he, as the child’s father, cannot appreciate that love, and thank me for supporting a child that I DO NOT HAVE TO, then that is NO LONGER MY PROBLEM. If he cannot put aside his selfishness for one evening for the sake of his child, then he needs to re-evaluate his role as a father.

He says if the tables were turned, he would not do it. But if the tables were turned, I’d never ask that of him… I would think about what’s important to that kid on the stage, and that would be my focus.

But then, that’s just me. I guess my priorities are different.

This entry was posted on June 21, 2007 at 6:37 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.