Angry and Alone
The simplicity of these two words sums up my entire being at the moment. I am unspeakably angry: at life, at the X, at circumstances, at my own decisions. The feeling of powerlessness is overwhelming. When I stop and think, I know that I am not powerless. I know that I have rights. But I know that exercising those rights is going to cause an enormous amount of strife in my life, strife that I really don’t have the time or energy to deal with.
And so I feel alone in this fight; a feeling I’ve grown to accept and almost embrace. I take a deep breath and pray for guidance, for a sign…. for something to guide me back to a quiet, calm place where the storm in my head has rained out.
Please, please give me peace.